Flying across men's endless rails, whistling adrenaline Churning axles hissing past so many a longing gentleman Chasing what she's never had; rims gripping faithful track Each disembarking lover spurned; ne'er thought of turning back She, ever forward, leaves 'em gasping in billows of sultry steam Thick diesel firing through the veins of lady turned machine
H/T @Suzette B
There’s that secret poet’s quill at work again, my friend. Nicely crafted, Ben…
I won’t tell you where I keep it 😉
Sounds like a very smart plan… but know I can be stealthy at times. Just saying… 🙂
yours seems to be dripping daily with fresh ink, Friend… please leave me my humble nub 😉
Hmmm I can be as dark as ink and just as fluid but- I can also be most charitable… for a poetic friend. 🙂
❤
Interesting. I’ve never thought of trains as flirtatious before. Are you sure the disembarking lovers aren’t spurning her? This is something I really needed to bother my head about today, lol.
Sorry for troubling you, m’Lady! 👸
I was only troubling myself. I’m more of a peasant (where is the peasant emoji?!) as I feel your poetry is above me your highness🤴🏻
❤ ❤ ❤
Hmmm..yes we women ARE steamy now aren’t we… 🤭🤭🤭 Nice verse, Ben. 💐☺️
Thanks, Diana, I appreciate it – it’s fun to play with images like this!
Hehe. Btw I think your comment did not show up on my post..it appeared blank… Not sure y. Jus thought to let you know. 💐
I was trying to post this, which is relevant to your last letter:
Thanks Ben, saw it on my laptop now. For some reason it does not show on the mobile… Yes… Fear is the actual start of anger… 💐
What a magnificent steely and yet a simple everyday metaphor for a lady, the locomotive machine in constant motion.. Staying on the train, facing reality and being real.
Keeping it simple, I’m in awe of the thoughts flowing from the ink through your pen.
The locomotive is a lady machine. Amazing how you gathered your thoughts about her.
thank you – I think this comment got stuck in my spam – I’m sorry for the delayed response!
I responded, but I see it never went through. I just lost my train of thoughts and I can’t seem to gather them again.
I was asleep but now I am approving your comments – so it did go through, but I was in bed at the time 😴
But I love how you gathered your thoughts and how it flowed from the ink in your pen. The locomotive is a steely metaphor for a lady. Amazing attributes you give the Lady locomotive machine, staying on board that’s reality, it is real.
I just combined the ideas of two other wonderful poets, as you can see at the bottom right of my own 😊
Jumping train is so dangerous in any case.
hey, who said anything about jumping from a train? 😨
I love your play with words and the metaphors… So well and cleverly written 👌👌👌
well I was inspired by two other wonderful poets, as you can see at the bottom right of my poem 🙂
Ah I see what you did, nothing like feasting with greatness.
YES, exactly! It’s a privilege.
HAHA glad that you are. You are very humble indeed. Good day
❤
In addition to great poems, you also write great poem titles.
flattery will get you everywhere 🤡
Wonderful poem Ben! the comparison is a rare phenomenon ! 👍🤝
that is very, very kind of you, Srikanth 🙏
(BTW, does your name mean something?)
No my original post never went through.
Such a pity , I won’t be able to retrieve it.
Ah, I see what you done. Great poets to feed from, you surely can’t go wrong.
I’m just saying in the context of life, you can’t just jump train, maybe move to another carriage of the locomotive but jumping train is out of the question.
it seems to have gone through, but it ended up in my spam folder for some reason 🤷🏻
No my original comment never went through, and I can’t retrieve it not in the same essence I first distilled. But that’s me and words.
Jumping train I use as a metaphor for getting off at the next station. It feels like the end of a journey and who knows if one can embark on a brand new journey just like that. Change the carriage maybe, but not disembark, it feels like the last breath of life.
True and well said. Thank you.
I love steam trains and an Ode to one is as original as is memorable. Thank you, Ben.
Joanna
Thanks so much, Joanna!
Wonderful imagery! Well articulated! You say you are inspired by others, but in the process, I think, you also inspire others. Great!
KK, you are a very, very sweet man. Thank you.
Thanks for compliments from an equally sweet man!
❤
Kudos on your powerful train of thought…🙌
🚂💨💨💨
😉
I grew up close to a railway line in the 1950s and it was all steam trains then. They were always referred to in the feminine ‘she’ just like that old song ‘She’ll be comin’ round the mountain when she comes’.
Wow. I didn’t realize that song is about a train!
I always believed it was a train song and when I checked it on the internet it turns out that originally the tune was a spiritual hymn sung by those building the railroads (in America).
ah-hah!
thanks!
I love the use of metaphors in this beautiful tale! Reading this was a complete delight.
Thank you – the inspiration for the imagery was entirely from the two poets that I linked to on the bottom right – check out their poems – they’re both amazing!
I did! You’re very humble, Ben. I think that enhances all your works as a writer.
Thank you so much, Rishika 😳
Captivating work, Ben. Locomotives do capture our imagination and the personification you create in your poem is creative and sensory. Your poem also reminded of seeing a historic steam locomotive roll through Arizona last fall. Quite impressive! So is your poem.
Thanks, Michele! The train imagery came to me entirely because of the two blogger-poets that I linked to on the bottom right 🙂
I love how creativity expands and how artists are inspired by other artists. ✨
❤
Very engaging!
thank you so so much! 🙏🏼
Wow, this is beautifully crafted ❤️
Thank you kindly!
You’re welcome brother 😊
Wonderful poem! You had my attention from the first to the very last word…
Thank you so much, Karima – I really appreciate it. This poem was a perfect example of me having no idea where the flow of words and thoughts 💡 would take me – Essentially, I just followed the inspiration…
Trains will always retain their mystique for me. We lived in a small western Pennsylvania town with a sawmill and a railway station in the fifties when I was 5-8 years old. I remember what a marvel the new diesel engines were then. My 4-year-old brother hopped a freight train. Luckily, he was discovered before the train left the station.
As an adult, I have taken metro trains and auto trains many times. In Titusville, Pennsylvania, we took the “Dinky” narrow gauge steam train through the oil fields, and in Lancaster, through Amish farmland. 🙂 I guess it’s about time we catch up with the rest of the world and get some high-speed railways!
Your poem has interesting personification, a metaphor of the train as a woman, and male passengers who are rejected suitors of the train. In all fairness to the lady, I believe they desert her first! The striking photo suits the poem well. Have a great day, Ben! ❤
Thank you so much, Cheryl. Based upon your bio it seems you have led a life full of stories. It is very nice to meet you!
-David