My first bagua poem
rim where water licks surface air above rim side invisible but known existence only this side cornered word fish always turns to next corner edges clear to big shapes peering through edges side through which small sails visible before side edging in through hollow plastic hull near edge corner plant stiff and also in another corner bottom covered by many colors all over bottom
My friend Suzette introduced me to the bagua form of poetry so, of course, I had to give it a go!
madmetwo’s mention of the ‘beach I Ching’ series David reminds me I must do more work on my ‘wing, wang, dong’ series. Someone said I’d already started….dunno?
Re what you did I must congratulate you. It looks a challenge. I can well appreciate the fun and reward it gave you. Pity you missed the bubbles..oh well, next time….
Thanks, Don ๐
Regarding this particular poem, the form of it just made me think – ‘box’ – and, from there, it wasn’t a far cry to get to ‘fish tank’… the form sort of lent itself to the subject in this case. And, yes, it’s too bad about the bubbles…
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David
The fish looked quite content…..
maybe it was holding the bubbles in because of its excitement?
Of course…silly me not to realise
I looked it up as well… Always interesting to try new formats.
It’s become rather a hobby of mine ๐
Thanks, Mimsy!
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David
Love this.๐๐ฝ๐๐ฝ๐๐ฝ๐๐ฝ
Thanks so much, Shelley!
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David
Very cleverly constructed, David.
Thanks so much, Dolly
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David
You are very welcome, David.
This makes me think fondly of my daughter’s beta fish, Bubbles and Rainbow, sadly too short-lived.
And this form is one I will have to try. Maybe it will inspire me to get back to my beach I Ching series, something I keep meaning to do. (K)
I have no idea what your ‘beach I Ching’ series is, Kerfe, but I pretty much look forward to anything and everything you create and share.
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David
It’s something I did when Nina and I were posting regularly on memadtwo. Everytime I go to the beach I take photos of shells and driftwood in random I Ching arrangements and I would look them up one at a time and then do a collage and poem. I have many many photos I haven’t used yet. Maybe by the summer I can get back to it.
Wow, really liked this fun, roller coaster of a poem!
๐ ๐ Aaysid ๐ ๐
Another poem form!
Considering strong word limits, you still worked a lot of visual details of an aquarium life into this nice poem David. Only the air bubbles are missing ๐
Dang! I hadn’t thought of bubbles, Deb. ๐ฆ
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David
You’re obviously having fun trying these different forms, great to see.
I really am! It’s great, Pete ๐
Thank you,
David
Okay… How did you write such a brilliant poem, keeping the word limit to 64 words?!! ๐ฎ๐๐๐๐
You’re sweet, Diana. I just wrote it one word at a time ๐
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David
Not sure how the fish feels, I am in a head spin.
Andrew, I think the fish is fine, as always, oblivious to the reality beyond.
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David
Hopefully
Good start๐๐ป
Thanks ๐ There’s a first time for everything ๐
Yours,
David
Most welcome
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Nice job. I had to look up this form of poetry.
As always, I did too, Lauren โค
Yours,
David