Frantic whispers screaming stop, or: …

A ‘Magnetic Poem’ tanka

Wanna try? Click here.

why elaborate?
frantic whispers screaming stop
we like want need our
picture of a peachy life
as he beats her bloody raw

Notes

39 thoughts on “Frantic whispers screaming stop, or: …”

  1. Dear David,
    Thank you. The humanity which was taken away from me was given back in part by your poem. For that gift I can only offer my thanks and appreciation.

      1. Be happy, friend! It is a good thing to get it out into the light and feel like I am not completely thrown out of society and the world around me. I feel a little closer, a little less thrown out alone and that is precious.

  2. People ask, why do you stay, but there really is no escape. Women who have orders of protection get murdered all the time. And children multiply the complications. Even in “civilized” societies, men are always given the benefit of the doubt. A normal exterior is no guarantee against abuse, both physical and psychological. It’s always the woman’s fault. Which is why most rapes are never reported. (K)

  3. Not a beautiful poem, and not expected to be either. Expresses in raw words the sordid abuse which such a intimate relationship should be devoid of, but sadly present in many.
    I often wonder what can cause such heinous actions David! I knew one such person in real life, and he was the gentlest of people in public life.

    1. I cannot relate to it, Deb. I once, while sitting on my chair before my computer, swatted my wife away (she was standing next to me) because I was annoyed by something she said… and I swatted harder than I’d intended. I didn’t hurt her (I asked), but she was stunned and upset at me… and I still feel guilty about that.

      1. That… We all have our moments of swatting and being swatted in return πŸ™‚ – not excusing the action but we are human and this is a real relation without pretence!
        The harm is done when the hurt is intentionally to degrade someone.

          1. Absolutely understand your point David and appreciate, and we have our beautifull daughters to take care of! It worries me many times…

  4. What a nightmare situation for anyone to be in and there’s no waking up from it for some.
    I was intrigued to see how you formed your poem with the use of a kit. It works well though I expect a lot of work still goes into it and not as easy as it sounds. πŸ˜€

    1. Lesley – the magnets (which you can play with online) are a very good exercise for me – attempting to express myself with a limited selection of words really makes me think about what I am really trying to say – and what connotations every single available magnet word carries with it. It’s fun!

      ❀
      David

    1. I’d been thinking about it for more than a day after reading The Paltry Sum’s blog post, which I linked to at the bottom of my blog post…

      😦
      David

  5. This is a most unnerving poem. Mostly because we don’t want to think about the violence that possibly occurs behind closed doors in what we idealize as a “nice, quiet, neighborhood”.

  6. The reaction to being abused by a family member is often shame, especially if a man is being abused by a woman. The victim often thinks it’s their fault and both want to pretend, as you said, that things are “peachy.” An informative and well-written poem, David. You have proven that magnetic poetry can be used to write about serious subjects. πŸ™‚

    All the best!

    1. It’s a horrible, difficult subject, Cheryl, but I was really affected by The Paltry Sum’s blog post, which I linked to at the bottom. That such things happen borders on the surreal.

      πŸ’”
      David

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