Oh… no!, or: Oh… yes!

A schuttelreim

The beast stole forward, creeping slow
Soon puss would feast on sleeping crow

35 thoughts on “Oh… no!, or: Oh… yes!”

  1. Fun! Maybe a bit gross too. ๐Ÿ˜†
    I will (attempt to) add one to the mix:

    To the kitchen the vegan did strut; sheโ€™ll not be eating crow
    At the chopping block is where sheโ€™ll be, cutting eggplant

    Love learning new poetic forms from you! ๐Ÿ˜„

    1. Michele, that’s super cute, but it’s not a schuttelreim because the final two words of the two lines don’t rhyme – they’re not a spoonerism…

      โค
      David

      1. Thanks teach! I realized that after the fact. Guess I am eating crow, with a fork, not a spoon! ๐Ÿ˜† Here is my modified attempt, with a rhyming couplet~

        From the garden she grows her meal, she culls evermore
        To the kitchen the vegan does strut; sheโ€™ll not be eating crow

        1. Eating crow is a tough one.

          The spoonerism would sound like – creeting owe, but that doesn’t mean anything… Not all words have workable spoonerisms.

          1. Oh, got it! Yeah, I did pluck a tough one! I will just go chop some veggies now. ๐Ÿคช Thank you for the schuttelreim lesson. ๐Ÿ˜

          2. Thank you. Same to you, David. ๐Ÿ’— I just read what I wrote, that doesn’t even rhyme. I should not attempt rhyming (or chopping) before I have had a cup of coffee. ๐Ÿคฃ My schuttelreim sucks, but it has been fun. ๐Ÿ˜

          3. Never! Critique away. I created a schuttelreim mess! ๐Ÿ˜‚ I will try again. Later. After my cup of morning joe settles in.

  2. Another one! You are on fire… but then I read the comment about doing them ahead. Still impressive and a real work out for the grey matter…

  3. Ok hereโ€™s my first attempt:

    I went to buy some cooking fat
    And tripped over the flipping cat ๐Ÿ˜น

    The family friendly version doesnโ€™t quite workโ€ฆ

    1. That’s awesome! ๐Ÿ˜€

      BTW, I’m writing these because I want to get ahead in my #APoemADay game… so I wrote 7 gogyohkas for this week, now working on 7 schuttelreims for the following week… and then,… not sure yet.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s