An Alouette
Weighing sensation's
Sheer desperation
At lack of other poets,
For expressive minds
To serve as remind-
ers candor not to omit.
Deep pangs of mute heart
Play merely one part
In yearning for words that speak
Worlds, while dolent soul
Feels itself quite whol-
Ly: adrift, self, hollow, bleak.
The Alouette
This form was created by Jan Turner. Following are the rules:
- Consists of two or more stanzas of 6 lines each (12 lines or more);
- With the following set rules:
- Syllabic: 5/5/7/5/5/7
- Rhyme Scheme: aabccb
Oh!!! I sooooo relate to the last six lines. (I was tapping away on similar theme today – but I think you’ve done in six lines what I mangled in about 20 or more)… Beautifully written.
In the interest of candour: not sure of the meaning of the first five lines (rare when I read your poetry, so thought I’d mention it :))
The beginning of the poem is an expression of existential loneliness I experience in the real world (as opposed to the virtual world) where I have no likeminded friends to exchange poems with… and how having such companions would give me greater strength to [continue to] express my truth via poetry…
Does that make the words more clear?
Ahhhh… YES! That makes total sense. (I forget sometimes there is a possible writer life outside the real world –er, whoops I meant writer life outside the virtual world haha… (literally that was an accidental switch! yikes!) and I totally get this. Yes, a trusted (and like-minded, progress-aimed) offline circle is quite a different setting than the world wide web…
Good luck with the poetry reading! The Alouette is starting to grow on me!! I may add it to the NPM scavenger hunt!!
is NPM only once a year? (the poetry reading was lovely!)
Breaking words between two lines, where parts of them rhyme, rather than entire words, adds a whole new dimension to expressing a forlorn, dolent soul.
Bravo,
D
๐ค Dolly ๐ค
A good capture of adrift. I know that state well. (K)
๐ Kerfe – thanks so much ๐
The Alouette seems to be a very versatile form. You have used it in two very different poems with great success, David! โค
โค Cheryl โค – you're very kind. Thank you.
Bounce string to the front back
When midnight flaps
As a toast of conversion
๐ Mansura ๐
Thanks!
David
obsessive scrambles
leaves poet home alone
oh silence shine your light
๐ Barbara ๐
thank you kindly – you inspired it though; I could never do this on me own; seriously ๐
You’ll meet other Poets soon.
maybe today! ๐คฉ
What’s going on then?
poetry reading (and by coincidence it’s down the block from me!)
๐๐๐๐ fantastic – enjoy
this ‘awaiting moderation’ takes on a whole new meaning ๐
O good,terrific, do tell.
brilliant ๐
๐๐ Barbara ๐๐