“The more you know, the more you grow”
Before I began writing poetry online last year, I’d never heard of a tanka, let alone a renga. Once I came to understand the concept of a tanka, I started responding to other poets’ haikus on their blogs occasionally, to show my appreciation.
I have long been impressed with Sangeetha’s (‘Mindfills’ blog) writing, which magically and seemingly effortlessly weaves multiple poetry prompts together. If I had more time, I would attempt to complete all of her haikus, out of sheer excitement. In any case, on April 4th, ~6½ months ago, I responded to a particularly enchanting poem of hers, which she wrote as follows (my [response] is bracketed & bolded):
touched by a moonbeam tranquil lake shivers silver ~ripples reach my ears [listening closely, I hear lowest hanging clouds murmur]
To my surprise, Sangeetha responded to my response, thereby launching our renga partnership (previous to that I hadn’t even known that rengas existed)! We are continuing ‘Ripples’ and shall be exploring further opportunities for collaboration. For me, this has been an incredibly fun and fulfilling new experience.
Not so long ago, we arrived at our 50th verse (a Gojūin)… and we’ve now completed our 70th… which means that we are well on our way to 100 verses (a Hyakuin)!
Spreading ripples
1 ~ 20
touched by a moonbeam tranquil lake shivers silver ~ripples reach my ears [listening closely, I hear lowest hanging clouds murmur] hanging clouds murmur mischief firing up some fun ~pillow fight follows [sudden unexpected kiss below falling down feathers] falling down feathers caressing cherry blossoms ~April rain showers [shivering streams of silver matting our hair as we dance] as we dance all night starlight splattering on souls ~ summer sighs softly [as time's tender tendrils tug temptingly towards autumn] autumn always clicks photographs in sepia ~ I'm thinking of us [thoughts flurry in photographs like snow in the negatives] a flurry of snow when wayward winter winds whoosh in a gust of glee [off-grid up in the mountains renga partnership on pause] partnership on pause winter ice and summer sun ~ melt to meet again [rivulets rush rapidly flowing freely together] rushing rivulets rumba in rugged rhythm ~ rapture on the run [grrrowling in utter delight bear cubs wrestle on the banks] wrestling bear cubs laugh catching snowflakes as they fall ~ into each other [mama bear splashes nearby ~ looks like fish for lunch again!] splashes nearby squirrels run helter-skelter bushy tails must dry [skittish fawns sip crisp water wise doe eyes big mama bear] fireflies flitter festive forest fairy lights fire up furry friends [finches flip-flapping for fun friendly ferrets frolic forth] tickled by a prank hedgehogs roll over laughing spraying pins on pines [distracted by silliness they struggle with their renga] waterfall of words wrapping wild winds of wonder ~ nature's poetry [animals caper through falls painted rainbow by the flow] through the waterfalls fireworks of colour sparkles rain rainbow showers [blue bear cubs, scarlet squirrels dance with dandelion deer] delicate dewdrop settles on slumbering sloth ~ waking up can wait [while white rabbit rushes by LATE for an important date] bouncing up the slopes bubbly bunny spots his date boldly beckoning [brown-eyed doe awaits white buck brunch first, followed by breeding] calling all creatures crickets rub their wings in glee commotion ensues [rabbits get separated date delayed by disturbance] wild winds whirl westward sweeping willow off her feet ~ bending all the rules [long leaves largely lie lengthwise tree trunk uprooted and torn] snow white owlet wakes perches high on broken branch eyes wide open now [violet voles, mauve mice hide; lavender lizard makes haste] slowly the skies clear streaming sunbeams serenely soothing nature's soul [silence, anticipation, shall subsequent stanzas soar?]
21 ~ 30
soaring beyond skies on the wings of a whisper ~imagination [carried beyond the Kármán line dreams softly sparkle in space] dreams softly sparkle stardust scattering magic enchanting angels [hallowed halos humbly heal humanity’s horrid hate] healing human hearts slowly soothing seething storms ~ a drizzle of peace [people, awash, cleansed with love regret’s tears flow into rain] flowing into rain forever flees to freedom time watches…silent [wet mist sprays eternity from infinity’s grand stage] infinity sighs ripples shiver fleetingly water wonders why [touched by familiar moonbeam tranquil silver lake of time shimmers] lake of time shimmers stars stop a second to swoon night skies reset clock [Chronos begins once again Aion amused to no end] gods of time giggle shuffling seas, stars and seasons ~future presents pasts [ribbons bright are pulled undone miracles beneath the lid] miracle makers muse cherry blossoms spring open ~ unwrapping present [beckoning futures contract floating out on sparkling dust] beckoning futures baby buds blithely blossom into tomorrows [pollination’s powerful potential persevering] preserving prayers paradise plants seeds of hope in every dew drop [daffodils drawing diet from damp delectable dirt]
31-40
holding on to earth daffodils reach for the sky stretching all that’s real [twisting tesseract appears folding nature on itself] tesseract unfurls new seeds of infinity merge in a moment [seconds conceived so quickly multiply into minutes] minutes make magic melding my memories melted in moonlight [mystical meanings emerge manifesting magnetism] mystical moorings ~ toes of trees dig into earth arms reach out to sky [the unanchored tilde floats through lush branches to the sky] lush branches start life swinging on maybes earth and sky await [syllables swing down from above seeking new bough to rest upon] syncing syllables songbird stumbles on poetry simply profound [peeping, warbling, chirruping, trilling chirping to own beat] birdsong in the breeze winds in my heart howl Hush! I know the lyrics [flows chamber music, full of soul feathers settle on music sheets] feather-note on keys hushed hymns float over forest soothing baby’s breath [steady syllables soften sleeping suckling’s disquiet] dusk draws the day’s drapes softening sounds of sunlight ~ a lullaby yawns [twilight nestles newborn in night transformed by tender tunes] a tender night hums fireflies mimic starlight dreams drift on ~ seeking [Polaris paving phantasms projecting paths pellucid]
41-50
pellucid pathways ferrying northern lights to the astral lighthouse [Great Nebula clouds starbeams Argo Navis sails off course] a cloudburst of stars concocting constellations coruscating skies [Orion shoots from the hip Sirius guides arrows bright] horizons hold hands rainbow star travels all night on a trail of light [tranquil lake shivers silver rippling as starlight dissolves] a touch of starlight waking up wanton waters ~ earth and sky mingle [wrangling, willful water witch wrests wish from wild elements] wild elements whirl winds dance to songs from heavens joy begins new day [dreaming gives way to daydreams wish washed away by real world] sun spins out of hand real world tries tethering stars ~ fortune flashes by [forgiving fortuity ~ foredoes foreboding fortune] universe aligns shards of time tessellate unfurling presents [~ all united, sharing tea time for long conversations] evening sky blushes curling pink whispers of cloud into silent words [cirrus clouds spell I LOVE YOU for juicy peach setting sun] sighing so softly trailing tender tremors my soul surrenders [touched by thin, teasing tendrils you’re sweetly, softly seduced] beyond the brink melting moments and lifetimes ~ I sleep into you [forms fading, dreams displacing ~ souls slowly slip together]
51-60
ensconced in one skin eyes entwined in eternity ~each, the other [passions ~inflamed~ ~scorch~ reason ~flames~ ~roast~ our marshmallow s'mores] hot chocolate follows a zephyr swirls our futures in a single mug [cuddling together ~ taking sips of steamy, sweet, thick love] molten melded love sluicing from primal springs in a splash of life [~ deep, mountainous confluence ~ whole souls, gold nuggets sparkle] sparkling souls ignite enchanting earthly embers ~ heavens fan fires [red rivulets flow forth from fervency's fierce fiery forge] fervent fingers find forbidden forgotten flares flaming fantasies [feverishly frisky friends full of fond fascination] fascination flows sultry skins soak in summer burning through the breeze [gossamer hairs and goosebumps demanding due attention] a shiver ripples setting both hearts aflutter tender touch travels [lips locking in longing love Your heart pounding in my throat] thirsting wantonly a tempest of desire swayed by your soft sounds [pregnant potential pulses ~ poetry procreating] tender thoughts tangle our forevers mingling souls ~ words weave warp and weft [newborn song wrapped, warmed in quilt eyes closed, hearing world's music] nestled in new song we hum to just made up lyrics ~ sublime symphony [soft soulful strains suffuse us ~ ~ Melody opens wise eyes]
61-70
melody of minds serenading new seasons ~dandelions dance [wind whipping manes, lusty roars terrify timid tulips] rushing after winds a flurry of pink petals ~ infatuation [zephyrs chased through jungle gym amidst flirtatious titters] fragrance flirts freely just born spring brushes blush pink on nature's fingertips [pert currents tightly tangled to titillating results] tingles travel up lighting up secret spaces in shy resplendence [receptive neurons sparking signalling suggestively] a whirlwind of sparks firing up barefoot desire to walk on water [toes, tingling, test the surface breams bubble in amusement] soda pop bubbles giggling up from limpid lake burst out laughing [reed straws send sweet syrup shoot- ing straight up into the air] air is tickled pink breeze brings perfumed love letter 'I's dotted with hearts [chortling cherubs chasing hearts fondly fashion arrowheads] drawing a rainbow cherub's arrow curves a smile striking pot of gold [clatter creates confusion ~ lazing leprechauns alarmed] jumpy djinns in joy jiving to jabbering jays just to jest a jot [grumpy gremlins look for lamp to trap too jovial djinns] lamp lights up magic stars and spells scintillate sky heavens watch fireworks [resplendent sparks exploding searing Icarus' wings]
P.S.
I’ve said it before, and I still stand by it: ‘Ripples’ is a fantastic name for a renga!
The Skeptic's Kaddish 🇮🇱 
Oh my godly goodness!!! I never thought I’d encounter such a looooong read when I came across this page…70 stanzas? Woww :0 this was honestly… I can’t even describe it! I’ll probably have to read it another couple of times to tell you how I felt about it… 😀 and in the meanwhile, here’re a couple short reads from me, you certainly won’t find these tiring!
https://theforgersoffantasy.art.blog/2021/10/10/life/
https://theforgersoffantasy.art.blog/2021/10/21/window/
I’m curious…have I given these before? I forget easily… hehe
nope – you hadn’t shared those yet – I really like them! especially the “window” one!
❤
David
Glad you did! 😀
David!!!!
Utterly thrilled to reach our 70th verse 😀 Thank you for being the most amazing writing partner.
And dear readers… the 6 1/2 months taken to reach here is entirely my fault. David responds within minutes and I take….oh don’t ask 🙈
Thank you all so much for reading and sending in your thoughtful thoughts
Sangeetha
https://mindfills.wordpress.com/
😘 😘 😘
❤️🤗
😁https://mindfills.wordpress.com/2021/10/24/ripples-a-renga-70/
🤗 Sangeetha 🤗
You’re my bro from another mo. That’s it. Settled and done. But I’ll bet there are many who feel like that. :)) I love this gorgeous conjoined po!!! I love how you put your responses in bold with square brackets. That’s easy on the eyes.
But if I might be so bold… what I had a very hard time with was reading the yellow-backgrounded text. I saw in on a shorter one of yours and thought it added a certain saffron something that was perfect, but this was too long of a section for the reading to be easy, for me, at least… is it on purpose or is it an accidental formatting… and please forgive me if I’m putting my foot in my mouth dear friend… again, lovely lovely lovely collaborative poem!!!!
1) Thank you! ❤ ❤
2) Where is the yellow-backgrounded text? I am definitely concerned about readability – so all feedback is very much appreciated!
❤
David
1) You’re welcome :)) :))
2) In WP reader view, for me at least: the following is yellow-highlighted:
– “[response]” in the second paragraph of the post
– the entire collab poem, but not the title of it, nor the numbers (of the verses) (e.g. 1~20), and the body text of the post script (but not the heading “P.S.”)
ok – I got rid of all the colors – is that readable now?
yes! That is SO much easier to read 👍
by the way – I think the “backgrounded” text is a WP glitch – I wasn’t trying to “background” it – only to make the words themselves different colors… I’ve been in touch with them regarding this.
Ah ok! I was just sending screenshots, but you fixed it already. Back to easy reading, I am happy :)) Nice work sorting it out so quickly!
❤ thanks again ❤
I am amazed at this wonderful collaboration! I can’t wait to see where it goes as it marches to 100 verses!
💜💘 Muri 💘💜
it’s absolutely wonderfully fascinating when two different poets decide to collaborate – each bring something of their own voices to the table, while also trying to work with each other – and in this case, as you’re writing to a specific form, it’s all the more so challenging; I suspect the rewards though overcome any difficulties.
these are wonderful, insightful, playful …. and on and on – lovely little gems, pocket poems, and yes, a longer conversation too – definitely a pleasure to share in both your efforts and skills, creativity 🙂
one note though: David, you might want to reconsider your colour choices for the fonts – because anything on a “dark background” usually is hard to read for most people, and then when you start using other colours? it all becomes a bit blurry and smeared; this also has to do with the front choice, but mostly, it’s the colours …. so perhaps you might want to re-think the presentation a bit? fiddle with it and see what appears “clear and sharp” – not so boldly contrasting …. it’s a shame to not easily be able to read the words (this is just my opinion, others may disagree about the colour scheme – so maybe ask about it?)
WC47, are there specific colors that are hard to read? All of the colors I use are part of the theme itself, but this is definitely something I am concerned about. Thanks for bringing it up ❣️
😘
David
it’s hard to be specific, because everyone will view it differently, but generally – the higher, harsher the contrast, the more difficult it can become to see clearly – so even as you choose colours related to your theme, what you have to consider is that most “word” blogs, i.e. where writing – lots of it – is the featured content, tend to stick with the boring – white background with either dark grey or black – because it’s the easiest to read. That being said, some of the colours from your theme actually “smear” a bit – like the coral-orange, or the “algae green” – but it also has to do with font choice, so something that is say, not italicized may read clearly, or sometimes, using “bold” as a choice, also causes a subtle blurring effect. What you have to remember is that most of any theme’s complimentary colours tend to be used more as “accents” – for links or headings etc. So sometimes, even for the best of reasons, like trying to distinguish “one voice” from another, like in a collaborative poetry work, the choices we really have at our disposal are limited. For me, the golden standard is this: a poem or flash or even a personal write *should* be easy to read – clear, simple font – whether on a dark or light background. I know I’ve monkeyed around with it enough throughout the years – sometimes it’s hard to find the right combo. But as I said, you can ask your readers for their input – see how they’re able to read the “page” – and here’s another “consideration” – on what devices are people reading – mobiles, traditional computer screens, through the “reader” feature, in an email subscription? Because remember this, no matter how “snazzy jazzy” you make a post – in the different formats it’s “read” differently, i.e. the WP reader is straight-up white background. Hope this helps some.
thanks so much for taking the time and energy to help me, WC47
I really appreciate it.
❤
David
no problems at all ….
Wow – Wonderful
💚💓 Lauren 💓💚
Wow. Creativity at its bestest. Wow… 👏 you guys rock!
🤎💕 Selma 💕🤎
David, I am absolutely delighted for you – how you have come out, nay sky-rocketed…
💗🖤 Barbara 🖤💗