Rain, or: Shine

A Waltz wave poem

gray
over-
cast
heavens;
my daughter
believes
God's
crying
up above
Jerusalem
and wonders
why God
gets
so sad
during the
autumn
and
winter
months

Waltz wave?

  • a one-stanza poem;
  • nineteen lines;
  • each line has a set number of syllables;
  • the pattern is: 1/2/1/2/3/2/1/2/3/4/3/2/1/2/3/2/1/2/1;
  • words may be split into syllables to fit the pattern;
  • this form seems to educe a soothing cadence as the lines gently increase and decrease, so it is suggested that topic chosen for this form also be soothing.

#TankaTuesday

The above was written for Colleen M. Chesebro’s ‘Tanka Tuesday’ prompt: Poets are to choose their own forms and colors to feature in their syllabic poem.


Let’s write poetry together!

When it comes to partnership, some humans can make their lives alone – it’s possible. But creatively, it’s more like painting: you can’t just use the same colours in every painting. It’s just not an option. You can’t take the same photograph every time and live with art forms with no differences.

Ben Harper (b. 1969)

Would you like to create poetry with me and have a completed poem of yours featured here at the Skeptic’s Kaddish? I am very excited to have launched the ‘Poetry Partners’ initiative and am looking forward to meeting and creating with you… Check it out!

90 thoughts on “Rain, or: Shine”

    1. Yeah – here too! we’ve had a lot (relative to Israel) of rainy days recently… I know it’s healthy for the country, but I don’t love being outside in the rain… not my thing at all!

      โค
      David

    1. ๐Ÿ’• Elizabeth ๐Ÿ’• – nice to meet you too! Thank you for the kind comment, and I’m so glad you like this form… if you write a waltz wave of your own, please share the URL with me in a comment on my blog.

      Also, please feel free to call me ‘David’, cuz that’s my first name. The word ‘ben’ simply means ‘son of’ in Hebrew, and my father’s name was ‘Alexander’… I know my pen name is confusing – I’m really sorry about that!

      All best,
      David

  1. The heavens have been that way here as well…but today (freezing) clear skies! Evidently our only one for awhile. Can’t be melancholy all the time. (K)

      1. Ma friend, it’s been a long time since you’d written a waltz wave, so yeah, I did expect one to come from you, it made for a refreshing change! ๐Ÿ™‚

        1. She, in fact, has atlases in both English and Russian, not to mention all the videos and educational games that she has access to. She’s aware of the existence of other places with other realities than hers.

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