She'd had no reason to escape Yet his affection set her free Stiff iron bars were soft landscape Her fingers knew each gray beech tree Sweet cricket chirps in metal scrapes Leaves rustling in men's shaking knees Of her lithe dance his love took shape Bashful, he turned the prison key
Note: An early attempt at poetry partnership
Long before I launched ‘Poetry Partners’ and offered other writers an opportunity to partner with me in writing poetry, I had already tried my hand at penning verses inspired by works I’d read on other blogs. The above was one such piece of mine, written in Nov. ’20, which was inspired by a delightful poem of Diana Menezes’.
The two lines from Diana’s poem that excited my imagination and inspired my poem were:
I had no reason to escape, Yet your affection set me free.
d’Verse Open Link Night
I am sharing this poem for d’Verse OLN #311.
Let’s write poetry together!
When it comes to partnership, some humans can make their lives alone – it’s possible. But creatively, it’s more like painting: you can’t just use the same colours in every painting. It’s just not an option. You can’t take the same photograph every time and live with art forms with no differences.–Ben Harper (b. 1969)
Would you like to create poetry with me and have a completed poem of yours featured here at the Skeptic’s Kaddish? I am very excited to have launched the ‘Poetry Partners’ initiative and am looking forward to meeting and creating with you… Check it out!
39 thoughts on “Lock, or: Love”
Allegory and illusion, smoke and mirrors, slavery and manumission, this poem has it all!
💖🧡 Muri 🧡💖
Well, to me, your poem can have more than one meaning. Either she was in a literal prison or it was one made of her thoughts…which can be just as damaging and limiting. Well done on the collaboration and I might just take you up on your offer one day. Thanks, David!
💛💘 Gayle 💘💛
I love this, David. I’ve got a real soft spot for traditional poetry formats and classical themes, and this checks all the boxes. It’s such a flowing piece with some amazing imagery. I’m a syllable-counter, so my natural inclination is to check for patterns whenever I read poetry. This is brilliant and has me grinning a LOT. 😀 A tip o’ the cap to you, sir! 🙂
🤍💓 Mike 💓🤍
Everything we read leaves its traces on us I think. (K)
💙💗 Kerfe 💗💙
Well done with using another’s lines, David. This seems to be a very complex relationship.
💘💜 Merril 💜💘
wonderful delivery D and D💖👏👏
💕🧡 Cindy 🧡💕
This is gorgeously rendered! She seems like she has more than just love on her mind 😀
💝💚 Sanaa 💚💝
Quite the accomplishment, David. But collaboration too often leads to less cohesion, less through line. For me, it seems, my words are my children, and I can’t allow them to be disciplined by others. I find it hard enough to hold my thoughts from stanza to stanza. Building half a bridge, and letting someone else finish it has no appeal. But that’s me. You, sir, are an entirely different creature.
❤ Glenn ❤ ~ I think of it somewhat differently. To me, each poem stands on its own – it doesn't require the other. But together, they form a third entity… it's like a bonus pleasure!
“Love has reasons that Reason knows nothing of.” De Foucault
Loved this. 🙂
❤️💞 Chris 💞❤️
I just listened to a podcast about love relationships between inmates or inmates and jailors… I felt that she tricked you actually
🙃 🙂 Björn 🙃 🙂
Nicely done David! 😁👍👌 Those lines definitely set the scene! 👍
💛💓 Ken 💓💛
This leaves a very vivid scene in my mind’s eye..I think I am the fly on that prison wall.. I like this a lot,David and I can see where sweet Diana’s lines set you to paint your own…
🤗😘 Karima 😘🤗