Torn, struggling heart, or: Butterfly wing

Butterfly Cinquain

one rent
butterfly wing
cripples more severely
than a hominid's broken leg;
it's more
akin to a torn, struggling heart
that beats impotently
in desperate


The above butterfly cinquain was written for Colleen M. Chesebroโ€™s โ€˜Tanka Tuesdayโ€™ prompt. Poets were prompted to employ this particular poetic form, which Colleen explains.

Let’s write poetry together!

When it comes to partnership, some humans can make their lives alone – it’s possible. But creatively, it’s more like painting: you can’t just use the same colours in every painting. It’s just not an option. You can’t take the same photograph every time and live with art forms with no differences.

Ben Harper (b. 1969)

Would you like to create poetry with me and have a completed poem of yours featured here at the Skeptic’s Kaddish? I am very excited to have launched the ‘Poetry Partners’ initiative and am looking forward to meeting and creating with you… Check it out!

44 thoughts on “Torn, struggling heart, or: Butterfly wing”

  1. Just love the message and how you bring it. You surely are an expert poet.

  2. This short poem really packs a lot of emotion in a small space. Love that the form and the subject make it a concrete poem as well!!

  3. An aching sadness permeates this poem. Wings are the very essence of a butterfly, and without them, its identity is sundered. It may as well be the sky without the stars or an eternally leafless tree. This is a moving poem, David. So well crafted and profound. ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. Oh to watch a butterfly with a broken wing is so painful
    Can you believe, your comparison to the hominid’s broken leg is so accurate. We can never imagine what this means to a butterfly.
    Physically and emotionally torn apart.

    You captured the essence and the appearance of a broken heart so vividly.

  5. โ€œitโ€™s more
    akin to a torn, struggling heart
    that beats impotently
    in desperate
    flutterโ€ The human struggle right here! ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘โค๏ธ

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