thoughts rattle over potholes; memories swiss cheesed with plot holes; possible pasts fragmented, scattered among packing peanuts; thicker; with; denser; every; greyer; passing; foggier; day
W3 poetry prompt
This sijo was written in response to A. J. Wilson’s W3 prompt ~ to write a poem in twelve lines or less, which includes the word ‘fragment’ or a derivative of that word.
‘Ronovan Writes’ poetry challenge
Sijo Wednesday #10
Ronovan encourages poets to use the words ‘growing up’ and/or ‘mature’ as their inspiration, as either a theme of their sijos or in their poems themselves.
A Korean verse form related to haiku and tanka and comprised of three lines of 14-16 syllables each, for a total of 44-46 syllables. Each line contains a pause near the middle, similar to a caesura, though the break need not be metrical. The first half of the line contains six to nine syllables; the second half should contain no fewer than five. Originally intended as songs, sijo can treat romantic, metaphysical, or spiritual themes. Whatever the subject, the first line introduces an idea or story, the second supplies a “turn,” and the third provides closure. Modern sijo are sometimes printed in six lines.
Let’s write poetry together!
When it comes to partnership, some humans can make their lives alone – it’s possible. But creatively, it’s more like painting: you can’t just use the same colours in every painting. It’s just not an option. You can’t take the same photograph every time and live with art forms with no differences.–Ben Harper (b. 1969)
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19 thoughts on “Potholes, or: Plot holes”
I read and then I came to read again
And again it felt like an abhorrent indictment against aging and the fragmetation of the mind
Slowly losing bits and pieces of memory
Such a blatant attack on the image of old age
And afterwards I thought, get back into the refrain
The limerick is brilliantly dark
The image in itself heartbreaking
You don’t know how old age will fetch you
Harsh and Honest
you know, perhaps it’s funny, but this is, in part, a reflection of my own experience as a 42-yr-old!
I beg David, a sharp mind like yours?😊
Very funny indeed
No not now, 🙂
No limerick, pardon me
Love what you have captured with such brevity in your sijo.
💝 Marion 💝
A fantastic play with words! 👏🏻
🙂 ❤ Michele ❤ 🙂
I like how the punctuation works at the end! This would be a fun one for a poetry reading.
❤ thanks, Sarah ❤
That second line is a gem. (K)
❤ 🙂 Kerfe 🙂 ❤
love the metaphors David!
“scattered among packing peanuts;”
sounds about right! 👏
❤ ❤ Cindy, thanks ❤ ❤
The imagery here is nothing but brilliant. “…swiss cheesed…” “possible pasts” ‘pasts fragmented” “thicker with…” You’ve outdone yourself. This is a fine piece! Well done!
Aww, thanks, Espie ❤
Your second line brought a chuckle… to be sure, I enjoyed the entire piece.
💖 Annette 💖 ~ thanks!
❤️💛 Dolly 💛❤️