can't blame the agent station's hummin' right as rain can't blame the porter jus' followin' instructions can't blame the switchman he's professional as they come can't blame the driver timely, uneventful ride gotta blame myself shoulda checked the track number shoulda noticed the sunset
The most intricate Japanese Poetry form is the Choka, or Long Poem. The early form consisted of a series of katauta joined together. This gives a choice of form structures of 5/7/5/5/7/7… etc., or: 5/7/7/5/7… etc.
The Choka could be any total line length and indeed many exceeded 100 lines. Looking at this, it is easy to see why Poetic Historians believe the katauta is the original basic unit of Japanese poetry using either the 17 or 19 unit onji.
d’Verse Quadrille #161
The above choka is my take on d’Verse’s Quadrille challenge.
The Quadrille is simply a poem of 44 words (excluding the title), and it can take any form. This week’s challenge was to use the word “track” in a Quadrille.
Let’s write poetry together!
When it comes to partnership, some humans can make their lives alone – it’s possible. But creatively, it’s more like painting: you can’t just use the same colours in every painting. It’s just not an option. You can’t take the same photograph every time and live with art forms with no differences.–Ben Harper (b. 1969)
Would you like to create poetry with me and have a completed poem of yours featured here at the Skeptic’s Kaddish? I am very excited to have launched the ‘Poetry Partners’ initiative and am looking forward to meeting and creating with you… Check it out!
61 thoughts on “Signs, or: Symbols”
Excellent chōka, David. 💜
🧡🙏🏻 Colleen 🙏🏻🧡
practicing mindfulness is always a good message in poetry!! 😉 Catchy rhythm, the Choka is cool! 👏👏
❤ Tricia ❤ ~ it is cool! It’s really grown on me 😀
Brilliantly done David! I must try a Choka sometime soon.
❤ thanks, Kim! ❤ ~ they're fun – I really enjoy this form, actually!
Ha! This is brilliant David! 👏👏👌👌😂😂👍👍
🤎🙏🏻 Ken 🙏🏻🤎
Wow I love this poem! 💕
A choka! I must learn all about this.
💛🙏🏻 Lesley 🙏🏻💛
Great take on the prompt, David! Always check the track number and always notice the sunset! Sadly, your poem would not work in the UK at the moment, with all of our intermittent rail strikes.
🤍🙏🏻 Kim 🙏🏻🤍 ~ that’s so annoying! Sorry to hear that.
Were you daydreaming at the train station ?
This was mostly metaphorical
Oh, I thought you sat out in the cold after you missed your train.
Love this David. 😂
💞🙏🏻 Sadje 🙏🏻💞
Haha…shoulda coulda…that’s life…in its funniest. Enjoyed reading!
💝🙏🏻 Sangeetha 🙏🏻💝
The best thing about trains is that there’s always another one… Good poem.
🚆 ☺️ Lisa ☺️ 🚆
💖🙏🏻 Arcadia 🙏🏻💖
“shoulda checked the track number shoulda noticed the sunset”, oh well, why not spend the night here?
🤭🙏🏻 Jim 🙏🏻🤭