Swiftly across steppes, or: Wistful glance at sunset

Traditional Mongolian Meter

Steed gallops swiftly across steppes
Steered smoothly by steely Mongol
Steel stirrups steady deadly shots
Steals last, wistful glance at sunset

d’Verse prompt: Traditional Mongolian Meter

At d’Verse, poets were encouraged to try their hands at ‘Traditional Mongolian Meter’, which is:

  1. written in any number of quatrains.
  2. syllabic, usually 7 to 8 syllables.
  3. head rhymed. Technically, head rhyme is just the first consonant of each line matching. However, while still alliterative, with the matched consonant heading the line, it is often seen as the first syllable in each line rhyming with the first syllable of the ensuing lines. Rhyme scheme aaaa bbbb cccc etc. (Remember the rhyme is at the beginning of the line, not the end.)
  4. alliterated, although alliteration can occur within a couplet and need not be contained within a single line. If true or near rhyme is not present, alliteration of the first word of each line is a must.

Let’s write poetry together!

When it comes to partnership, some humans can make their lives alone – it’s possible. But creatively, it’s more like painting: you can’t just use the same colours in every painting. It’s just not an option. You can’t take the same photograph every time and live with art forms with no differences.

Ben Harper (b. 1969)

Would you like to create poetry with me and have a completed poem of yours featured here at the Skeptic’s Kaddish? I am very excited to have launched the ‘Poetry Partners’ initiative and am looking forward to meeting and creating with you… Check it out!

31 thoughts on “Swiftly across steppes, or: Wistful glance at sunset”

  1. I was taken by that last line! Is it the steed that steals a glimpse of the sunset or is it the steely warrior? Either way it points to an inner life that is turned to more than war…

  2. S is a great consonant and you employed it so well to describe or bring to the fore the terror of Genghis Khan clad in steel.
    The wording engraves an impression of a scene in an apocalyptic movie.
    The final scene with steal – brilliant.

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