A Sijo
she stumbled upon idyllic path
one day, to great relief-
stunning, straight, sure, surrounded
by stern, steadfast, sturdy trunks;
certain, she strode forward...
behind her, her dears dispersed through the trees
Sijo?
A Korean verse form related to haiku and tanka and comprised of three lines of 14-16 syllables each, for a total of 44-46 syllables. Each line contains a pause near the middle, similar to a caesura, though the break need not be metrical. The first half of the line contains six to nine syllables; the second half should contain no fewer than five. Originally intended as songs, sijo can treat romantic, metaphysical, or spiritual themes. Whatever the subject, the first line introduces an idea or story, the second supplies a โturn,โ and the third provides closure. Modern sijo are sometimes printed in six lines.
Moonwashed weekly prompt
Let’s write poetry together!
When it comes to partnership, some humans can make their lives alone – it’s possible. But creatively, it’s more like painting: you can’t just use the same colours in every painting. It’s just not an option. You can’t take the same photograph every time and live with art forms with no differences.
–Ben Harper (b. 1969)
Would you like to create poetry with me and have a completed poem of yours featured here at the Skeptic’s Kaddish? I am very excited to have launched the ‘Poetry Partners’ initiative and am looking forward to meeting and creating with you… Check it out!
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๐ค
love the word play and great imagery David! โฃ๏ธ
๐ค๐๐ป Cindy ๐๐ป๐ค
๐โฃ๏ธ๐
“certain, she strode forward…” Oh those roots must be firmly grounded in order to move forward! Very nice reminder of strength and courage David and the image is strong! โค
๐๐๐ป LaToya ๐๐ป๐ ~ thank you!
~David
I love the alliteration!
๐๐๐ป Sangeetha ๐๐ป๐
I love the way it is written with ‘her dears’. I feel it is excellent wordplay and adds mystique to your poem. Brilliant piece, David.๐
๐๐๐ป Eugi ๐๐ป๐
๐David๐
David, did you mean to say her dears dispersed through the trees???
๐๐๐ป Judy ๐๐ป๐ ~ yes, I did, but I considered writing ‘the rest’ instead of ‘her dears’… I’m still not sure how I feel about it
Sorry… I thought perhaps you meant to write “her fears.” I always appreciate it when folks point out my many snafus..so didn’t mean to be rude.
Not at all! I appreciate it very much ๐๐ป ๐
Oh good…Don’t wish to offend. Both Dolly and Forgottenman often catch my snafus.
It’s in my family culture – we constantly correct one another in all the languages we speak, and that includes my eight-year-old daughter correcting my Hebrew pronunciation ๐ ~ which I encourage her to do!
I liked the alliteration. Great Sijo, David. ๐
๐ค๐๐ป Aishwarya ๐๐ป๐ค
But who are the dears
Why have they dispersed?
Well, I would assume that each dear had his or her own reasons ๐ค
Oh how could I undermine these beautiful gazelles, of course.
๐ฆ
Yes, time to let them go
They have a path of their own
๐๐ป Abi ๐๐ป
๐ฟ๐