The quack, or: His practice

This pseudo- medical professional Drew conclusion odd, nonsensical; His eccentricity made me skeptical, For he employed jargon none too technical. Wildly, he declared: Nothin' hypothetical! Your testicles hang grossly asymmetrical! Wha- You think it imperceptible? No, trust me- My specialization's geometrical! With my doc's tools metrical- they'll come out identical! Moonwashed Weekly Prompt Nonsensical